When You’re the Default Parent (And the Designated Therapist)
Mom on the floor, surrounded by energetic kids and household mess, visibly stressed but present; showing the emotional weight carried by default parents.
The Unseen Weight of Being Everyone’s Safe Place
If you’re the one who always knows where the lost shoes are, remembers every appointment, and holds everyone’s secrets (even on the days you want to scream, “Can someone else just be the grown-up?”) welcome to default parenting.
And for bonus points: you might also be the family’s unofficial therapist.
Default parents don’t get awards. What you get instead? The heavy mental load of keeping your family afloat, plus the emotional work of being everyone’s safe space.
You’re present and reliable, but damn, the cost is real. You hold all the messy, invisible threads together, just hoping no one notices when you finally drop one.
Default parents are the glue… never let anyone see you crack. But that invisible weight? It adds up, sometimes leaving you feeling burned out, resentful, and straight-up exhausted.
Why Resentment Happens When Caring Never Stops
Caring is beautiful; let’s not get it twisted. But when caring is your non-stop job, with zero clock-out, resentment sneaks in. Not because you’re ungrateful or dramatic, but because humans have limits. Carrying everyone else’s needs, feelings, and emotional shit doesn’t leave room for your own.
You might notice it when:
You’re irritable after endless days of picking up everyone else’s slack.
You’re the “go-to” for meltdowns, homework, or emotional first aid—even when your own patience is gone.
You feel invisible, like the house would slide into chaos if you took a damn day off.
Therapy for Default Parents: Healing, Not Blame
Therapy isn’t about shaming you or pointing fingers. It’s about giving you space to finally exhale, feel seen, and say: “I can’t do it all.”
In Florida, finding support means tackling resentment and burnout head-on, learning how to share the mental load without guilt, and letting go of blame (for yourself and your relationships).
What’s waiting on the other side? Healing. Real rest. Actually being present; not just physically, but emotionally, with your family and yourself.
Are you done feeling invisible?
Request a consultation and get back to being seen, heard, and supported for real.